Thought_Gallery

Jan 6, 2004

whats on your mind miss megan?

so yes. just sittin. talking to megs about life stoof. (thats stuff with an accent if you didnt know) and im listening to the good charlotte CD that kaiti burned me. "the young and the hopeless" an awesome CD. possibly my new favorite. awesome songs include:

Lifestyles Of The Rich And Famous
Wondering
My Old Man
Boys & Girls
Bloody Valentine
Riot Girl

the rest i didnt listen too deeply too because i was talking to megs and reading a couple blogs.

last night i was up till 2:30AM reading "Self- Reliance" by Emerson. i suggest you read it. you can at This Link Roight Here. or youll read it junior year if you take AP english at ferris high. rar. its a bitchen essay. it really made me think about my life. and a lot of his points i absolutely agreed with and i didnt even know about myself. of course one of his other points was how poeple dont notice things about themselves or dont accept them untill someone else mentions them. crazy people. im gonna quote a bunch of stuff. but later cause its long. so heres one.

"The other terror that scares us from self-trust is our consistency; a reverence for our past act or word, because the eyes of others have no other data for computing our orbit than our past acts, and we are loath to disappoint them.

But why should you keep your head over your shoulder? Why drag about this corpse of your memory, lest you contradict somewhat you have stated in this or that public place? Suppose you should contradict yourself; what then? It seems to be a rule of wisdom never to rely on your memory alone, scarcely even in acts of pure memory, but to bring the past for judgment into the thousand-eyed present, and live ever in a new day."

and heres the lyrics to a totally awesome song!

Good Charlotte - Riot Girl

She's got tattoos and piercings
She like Minor Threat, she likes Social Distortion
My girl's a hot girl
A hood rat who needs an attitude adjustment

Christina wouldn't wanna meet her
She hates you Britney so you better run for cover
My girl's a hot girl
A riot girl and she's angry at the world

Emergency call 911,
She's pissed off at everyone
Police, Rescue, FBI she wants a riot, she wants a riot

And everywhere we go she gets us thrown out constantly
But that's OK 'cause I know, I know
I know my baby would do anything for me, yeah

Christina wouldn't wanna meet her
She hates you Britney so you better run for cover
My girl's a hot girl
A riot girl and she's angry at the world

Emergency call 911,
She's pissed off at everyone
Police, Rescue, FBI she wants a riot
She wants a riot, she wants a riot

Don't you know that all I really want is you?
Gotta know that all I really want is you

Emergency call 911,
She's pissed off at everyone
Police, Rescue, FBI she wants a riot, she wants a riot

Emergency call 911,
She wants a riot, she wants a riot
Police, Rescue, FBI she wants a riot, she wants a riot

Posted at 09:10 pm by TheAveman
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GUYS ARE STUPID! THROW ROCKS AT THEM!

haha. yes. last night was a downer. but it made me realise a lot of things. like im done with overthinking. im done with overanalyzing. time to live. time to freaking live life. and the fact that your a part of my life makes it just so awesome. so what do you say...let simple things be simple things? i care about you, absolutely. so lets just sit back and have some good times. youve always brought me out of my own crap. thank you so much for being there.

Plain White T's - Fireworks (the whole song is bold because it effing rocks so much!!!![also i made it more bigger...^_^])

Well I don't mind waiting 'til you're comfortable with me
But what's it gonna take to prove that I'm for real?
'Cause you know how I feel about you
You know I can't live without you
I just wanna stay and make it real

'Cause I know, you know
it can't get much better
Fireworks flyin' whenever we're togetherhey
I know, you know, that I know you love me

Well I've made up my mind that I want you to be the one
The one I wanna be with when I'm ninety-two

I just wanna feel you tonight
making sure the moment's just right
I could die just staring in your eyes
I just wanna feel your heartbeat
hold you even closer to me
Fall asleep with you right by my side
We'll see fireworks tonight

I've waited all my life to make this perfect every way
And sharing it with you would make it even more than that
We'll see fireworks tonight

Posted at 05:14 pm by TheAveman
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Jan 5, 2004

haunting myself as the real thing

these tears
i can feel
in my chest

wishing for a way out

maybe they'll freeze on my face
so i could feel them
as more than this ache

maybe they'll fall in my coffee cup
so i could drink them away
and loose this ache

only one tear
it stays in the corner of my eye
small enough to stick
untill i wipe it away

i can see myself
reflected in the black liquid
inside a black cup

looking into my own eyes in painfull
look at my eyes
what do you see
what could you ever see
in me

Posted at 05:27 pm by TheAveman
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Jan 4, 2004

dreams to grab onto

i realised that this song has absolutely lovely lyrics. i also realised that i want to sleep. for the first time in a long time, i just want to sleep. tomarrow ill see her for the first time in 4 days. so no matter what happens tomarrow. that will make everything worth it. and a nice long hug. and a magick twig. tomrrow will be good. i know it.

Creed - Lullaby

Hush my love now don�t you cry
Everything will be all right
Close your eyes and drift in dream
Rest in peaceful sleep

If there�s one thing I hope
I showed you
Hope I showed you

Just give love to all

Oh my love�in my arms tight
Every day you give me life
As I drift off to your world
Will rest in peaceful sleep

I know there�s one thing that
you showed me
That you showed me

Just give love to all
Let�s give love to all

Posted at 10:30 pm by TheAveman
Comments (1)

Careful now, you're so beautiful When you've convinced yourself No one else is quite as beautiful (You're so beautiful!)

yes another good song. im so freaking tired. and my head hurts more now. and my parents are yelling at me for drinking coffee. and i still have a lot more homework left. and im not doing it. haha. i laugh at me. well... i dont know what else to write. and my computer just crapped itself. so heh. be right back.
ok so it wasnt right back, but oh well. kaiti called. sounds like she had a good time. camp spalding is a cool place i went there in 6th grade. good times. beautiful place. so ive come to the conclusion that not all my homework is getting done tonight. theres no way i can work with this splitting headache. and i want to. really. but i cant. it really freakin hurts. but anyway. enough complainining. found out about stuff about going to japan. like you cant take sudafed or vicks inhalers because there considered stimulants. and no more then 2 oz of perfume. also no more than 400 cigarettes or 100 cigars. haha. yes. looks like ill have to be cutting back from my 450 a day. lol. but no. i dont smoke and i dont use perfume so its all good. haha. yes. i saw megans away message and it was like "im in my room. call me." it was perfect. so i did. lol. and it was fun. as always. made my head feel better for a while. but then my mom has to come in and be like "get off the phone and take out the trash and do your homework" and so my head was like "ow" and i was like "gar stop hurting" haha. ok that was fun. i should do my vocab now. rar. seeya.

Posted at 06:50 pm by TheAveman
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just bend the pieces till they fit. like they were meant for it, but they werent made for this.

heres a poem i had to write for english. R@r.

Avery N.

I AM a boy who thinks too much.
I WONDER about the future.
I HEAR songs and phrases that bring back memmories and strike up feelings.
I SEE a sea of possibilty.
I WANT to learn how to fly.
I AM a boy who thinks too much.
I PRETEND to know what im doing.
I BELIEVE in other people more easily then in myself.
I TOUCH dreams and hope to grab onto them.
I FEEL for the first time.
I WORRY too much.
I CRY in moderation.
I AM a boy who thinks too much.
I UNDERSTAND only a handfull of my own thoughts.

Posted at 06:13 pm by TheAveman
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cold outside. warm inside.

gar. stupid homework. and theres more things id rather be doing. and i sort of have a headache. but its alright. no use complaining really. going back is going to be a nice challenge. ive grown a bit too used to hanging out and late nights. *sigh* oh well. a nap sounds good. but i wouldnt wake up till timarrow. and i wouldnt have my homework done. gar. but hey. i found that song where that lyric is from. man i love this song. so i think ill listen to this cd and try to get back to work. gar. lol

Dashboard Confessional - Hey Girl

Hey girl, you've got a smart way about you
That makes me
Wish that I was smart enough for you

Hey girl, you've got a fine laugh
And I think that I
Could get used to that
But you're already used to laughing at
Me

So what if your friends think I'm crazy?
Well, I wasn't trying to impress those girls anyway
They're all theory, no action
And where I'm from
We live like it's the latest attraction

Hey girl, you've got a short fuse
And I've got designs on lighting you up
And setting you off
And watching you burn for me

The world lives for the weekend
Well, I'll watch as my weeks bleed righ into them
Without a line
To divide
What is their's
And what is
Mine

So what if your friends think I'm crazy?
Well, I wasn't trying to impress those girls anyway
They're all theory, no action
And where I'm from
We live like it's the latest attraction

Go on, go on
Your cruel intentions won't
Solve your problems
Everyone's gotta get
Bottom
Bottomed out in the long run
And those are the times you need love (x3)

Posted at 05:01 pm by TheAveman
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She calls me from the cold Just when I was low, feeling short of stable

so yeah, yesterday i was feeling sort of wierd. and i figured out that it was because i was fighting with myself over my own feelings. i wanted them to come gradually and make things easier for us. like walking down a hill slowly. but in all reality, i feel off a cliff. and theres no denying it anymore. and dont be sorry. i understand. so after everything last night i felt better and not wierd anymore. after she knew how i felt. so yeah. the best thing about tomarrow will be seeing you. most definitely.

Posted at 04:59 pm by TheAveman
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Jan 3, 2004

Ever so sweet, you baked it in cakes for me.

love

i would guess that the most frequently asked question is 'how do you know?'
i would also guess that the most frequently heard answer is 'you just know'

but akren definitely had the best answer.

"it comes strong, it leaves quick, it stays forever, it breezes by. love is a many splendered thing, as fickel as the ones who hold it true in thier hearts. you can only listen to your heart, for only it knows for sure"

ha. the wise old sage strikes again.

but some questions that ive been asking myself.

why do people throw it around like its nothing. the word love. of course its just a word. but the meaning is lost when you use it and dont mean it

why are people scared of love? even the word drives people away. makes them uneasy.

how long? how long a lot of things. how long untill people arent scared of love and you can tell them how you feel. how long before you can trust your own heart. ive had my head trick me before. of course. getting the other person to really believe that you love them might be the hardest part. because others have tricked them before...

so im going to save this. and post it later. after i call megs and talk to her about it. because i want to talk to her about anything and everything. and i hope she knows that shes my everything. "ive fallen for you. dont stop me now. i want to keep falling."

Posted at 09:31 pm by TheAveman
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"i hate not being able to think straight."

yeah. like when someone says somthing great, and you know theres somthing you can say back thats just as great. but it dosnt come to mind. all i could do was smile.

"The tick tock of the clock is painful
All sane and logical
I want to tear it off the wall
I hear words and clips and phrases
I think sick like ginger ale
My stomach turns and I exhale"

yeah. i think too logically. overalalyse. screws me up ya know? but im getting better. i guess you could call that a new years resolution. if if your not, then im making it one so you have to! ha HA! lol. and another is to play giutar. everyone seems to have somthing they can do that everyone thinks is cool. i mean... i can swim, but everyone is SAS can kick my ass. so yeah. guitar. need to play again. need to practice. need to learn certian songs...

Posted at 02:32 pm by TheAveman
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