To all who still bother to check this:

I dont write here anymore and I dont plan to so yeah...this is sort of the official closing without deleting because i feel like leaving it up.

If there was still people checking this, I salute you, cause its fun to think that people would do that.

In anycase this is goodbye weblog for now.

The End.

-Ave

Restless Spiders: But but ... we were all sour grapes
Restless Spiders: stupid grapes
Restless Spiders: (*mutters mean things to grapes*)
Aveman20: lol its ok aubee the grapes never hurt anyone
Restless Spiders: (*punches grapes*) stupid fruit!! damn you to hell!! (*kills them*)
Aveman20: yes you were and i did pretty much everything possible to make your more sour
Aveman20: AHH NO THAE POOR GRAPES!
Restless Spiders: lol (*brings them back to life and gives them money*)

sooo. i really feel like making an entry about this. a memorable day indeed. now i know ive had many memorable days, but tonight i just feel like a blog entry. it was a picnic. a nice day. we had laughs and walked and sweet voiced and silly exchanges. and we carried the stuff the whole time. and it was soo pretty and so are you. and oh man. and there was a ferrett! and then the japanese garden. FEESH! the fish were awesome. it was just one heck of a lovely time. and then on the way to the car, you fed the pretty swans. BEST PICK-A-NICK EVAR! i love you sweetie, sleep well.

i know.

one of those dagger in the side comments right. but only because its true.

haha when the world/universe slaps me in the face with a "HEY MAN JUST LIGHTEN UP K?!" i am inclined to take such advice and will NOw do so! hahaha. sorry for the previous entry, told ya it wasnt for anything important. =P goodnight.

the mind. wields a piercing blade. and the wounds inflicted, woulds we would call emotional. are a pain greater than any cause by a cut that would actually bleed. it is a terrible pain to feel or to bear. an ache that spreads from the chest. almost cold. disabilitating. an ache that i can feel spread to my fingers. and i do understand how some would chose a bloody pain over this one. it is sudden, sharp and leaves quickly with little remnants, a scar or less. this "emotional" pain, and i add quotes because i dont know what else to call it for it is without proper cause, this emotional pain fades in slowly reaches a peak that would make me want to crumple to the floor and then slowly, achingly, painfully fades away again only to retun in another wave another slice. for no reason i tell you none. although i could be kidding myself both ways. in one there is a reason and i refise to admit it, in another there isnt and im bloody paranoid about there actually being one, so much so that i cause all the god damned trouble for myself and others!. the loop continues. but i am happy. i am dearest. i am you make things worth living and this nonsensical pain worth taking, for i know you can make it fade. as you always do. i love you dearest and i am happy and i am okay, im...probably just tired you know. and if so then im pretty damn dramatic about it arent i? hah. *sigh*


i love you so much. the highlight of every one of my days. love you kitty.

well you all know me.... and how i dont post anymore...yep.
about this. id prefer to talk to you, but your busy tonight with megan and marcus.
and kitty hope you get some sleep. i love you and ill see you in the morning.
i guess the only time ill see you is after school and at lunch megs...yeah. hope your sister managed to get the keys out so you could get home.... ah hell.


i honestly have no idea how to write in this thing anymore.

ill see everyone tomorrow per the usual. congrats to kitty for lettering. yay!

if anyone sees this and wants to cal ill be up and my heads right by the phone so...yep. goodnight everyone.

so... crappy night yes? yes. alright then. swim team pizza. nothing special. sposed to go see kaiti afterward. *MORON MISTAKE #1!* instead drive aquaintence from swimteam to concert at detour hoping kaiti could come but forgetting about how it would be bad for her. *MORON MISTAKE #2!* thinking 4 years blue was going to play next. so i ended up being there till 10:45 instead of...way earlier. *and another!* after pleading, giving liz and emily a ride home. thinking since they live my kaiti that it would be easy and a good deal. *DEAR GOD MAN NOT ANOTHER!* then stopping at dicks because emily was uber hungry and i didnt think it would take that long. *horrible stab* realising kaiti waited outside for me for 2 and a half hours. and at the end of the night heres what i ended up with. Soaked through with cigarette smoke and sweat. and wishing i could watch my own blood pooling on the floor after feeling it run through my fingers. (thats creepily cryptic) SO angst lovers enjoy! (peter) heres one for the record books. now. i know im tired cause my face hurts. lol yes. my face. and its 3:15 almost. hope this didnt freak anyone out. im not all suicidal and junk. ill be looking forward to your call tomorrow. of course this entry is just another example of me being a moron. its all.....bleh. anyway....sleep.

well i havent written in a while and hell i dont even know what to write. i know whats on my mind but dont know how to write it. what a surprise. maybe thats why i dont blog anymore. lifehouse rocks though. so does priest lake. random images if that for some reason. another dissapointing lan. time that would have been much better spent with kaiti. and ive been meaning to call megs. seems shes enjoying her cd which is good and that mateo guy is creepy. and blah freakin joe and his immaturity. jeez get over yourself already. ha i swear. the only person i know with the ability to just piss me off withut even really doing anything. blah. time to sink. that nice watery suspended sink into the cloudy.

jeez... after two full days, morning till night of trying to write this damn thing i can tell anyone that im horribbly tired of it. daydreams of carefree relaxation are drifting into my head against my will. what i wouldnt give to see you right now...